Give it up...

This is a particularly awful moment.

The propulsion final today was a disaster. Which made me realize that the word 'fail' is ingrained in 'final'. It was such a pain taking the test, that I have, temporarily, lost all interest in continuing with Aerospace Engineering. The interest will, of course, revive after a good night's sleep. Once I clear my bed of the millions of papers - all propulsion-related.

I thought of having a propulsion-paperwork-burning ceremony - but I'm not sure if that'll be a good idea, since a lot of people will want to save all that stuff for next semester, in case a repetition is in the cards...

I want to give-up. No, you don't, my super-ego tells me. My superego is my mom. A few years ago, when we were both having our poem writing/publishing marathon, she was churning out poems like 'Try Try Again', or 'I Can' - while I wrote something like this:

GIVE UP!

Are you facing one of those days,
When the sky is black and the clouds are grey?
When the world around you is moving ahead,
Leaving you behind, alone in your dread?

If you put in your best and failed,
If you’re the victim, whose dreams have been nailed,
Don’t curse your luck or wish you were dead,
“Just Give Up”, as somebody rightly said.

Just Give Up, it’s not so hard,
Your confidence, at least, will not be scarred,
Don’t think that you will lose your glory,
You can still be a Winner in your life’s story.

Courage, they say, is holding on,
Fighting in the darkness, till it is dawn.
But it takes courage to let go too,
And stand outside that ambitious queue.

If the tunnel is dark and you see no light,
If the battle you’re in is not going right,
Give up and go against the tide,
Break the rules, and hop off the ride.

Because he who fights and runs away,
Lives to fight another day.

I got the last two lines from an Alistair MacLean book. 'The Dark Crusader' I think. Although they say it's one of those stock phrases.
This poem didn't make my mom very happy.

For some odd reason though - I don't feel that bad. I suppose I'm more used to doing badly on tests than I was two years ago. All I know right now is that the world hasn't come to an end, I'm still fit, my family and friends are all okay, and I still have internet access, facebook, and youtube.

I have been amusing myself by watching old Aamir Khan coca-cola advertisements. I just decided that it would be awesome to meet that guy - he truly is my favorite actor. He can pull off any role - a tour guide, a Japanese tourist, a Bengali father, a Punjabi farmer, a crook, an English millionaire - anything.

That said, I feel the need to talk about the many virtues of youtube. I've been able to watch all the old songs I used to wait for forever to be telecast on TV while I was groing up. Maybe I'll write an ode for youtube someday. Right now, I really should get started on my two projects.

Fun fun. I can't wait for the next AerOnion.